how to tell if someone is projecting onto you
Psychological Projection Explained: 8 Examples Of Feelings We Project
It's not me, it's you: Explained Projection in Human Terms What is the projection? Has anyone told you to stop projecting your feelings about them? While the project is often reserved for the world of psychology, there is a good chance that you have heard the term used in heated arguments and discussions when people feel attacked. But what does projection mean in this sense? According to , the projection refers to unconsciously taking emotions or unwanted traits that you do not like about you and attributing them to another person. A common example is a cheating spouse who suspects that your partner is unfaithful. Instead of recognizing their own infidelity, they transfer, or project, this behavior to their partner. Why some projects? And is there anything that can help someone stop projecting? Keep reading to find out. Like many aspects of human behavior, projection is reduced to self-defense. Koenig points out that projecting something you don't like about yourself to someone else protects you from having to recognize parts of yourself that you don't like. He adds that humans tend to feel more comfortable seeing negative qualities in others rather than in themselves. Who does? "The objection does what all the defense mechanisms are meant to do: to keep the discomfort on ourselves at bay and outside our conscience," Koenig explains. She says that people who are more likely to project are those who don't know each other very well, even if they think they do. People who " feel inferior and have low self-esteem" may also fall into the habit of projecting their own feelings of not being good enough for others, he adds psychologist. It points to racism and homophobia as examples of this type of projection on a wider scale. On the other hand, people who can accept their failures and weaknesses—and who feel comfortable reflecting on the good, the bad and the ugly inside— tend not to project. "They don't have to, as they can tolerate recognizing or experiencing negatives about themselves," Koenig adds. The projection is usually different for each person. With that said, here are some examples of Koenig to help you get a better understanding of how the projection could play in different scenarios: If you recognize yourself in any of these scenarios, there is no need to overcome it. This can lead to more projection. Instead, try to focus on why you're projecting. There are some ways to do this. Make a Soul Search A good starting point, says Brustein, is to check how you really feel about yourself, especially your weaknesses. What are they? Are there things you actively do to contribute to them? Recommend that these questions be chosen in a journal. Koenig accepts the importance of self-reflection when it comes to projection. For her, self-reflection means "to get dressed with detachment and curiosity, never judgment." Look at your behavior and see if you tend to blame others for things you do or mislead negative qualities to others. If you do, take note of it and move on. Try not to dwell on it and judge yourself too hard. Ask someone who understands Sounds intimidating, but Koenig recommends asking someone close to you if they notice you're projecting. Make sure it's someone you trust and feel comfortable talking to. It could be hard to educate at first, but consider being honest with them. Explain that you're trying to understand better how you look at yourself and others. Just make sure you're ready to listen to things you might not want to hear necessarily if you decide to do this. Remember, however, that this information can help you learn to stop projecting. See a therapist A good therapist can be one of the best tools to overcome the projection. They can help you identify and address the reasons you are projecting and give you tools to help you stop. If the project has damaged a close relationship, a therapist can also help you rebuild that relationship or prevent it from happening in the future. You're not sure where to start? It is human nature to want to protect itself from painful or negative feelings and experiences. But when this protection becomes projection, it may be time to take a look at why you're doing it. Doing so can improve not only your self-esteem, but also your relationships with others, whether they are co-workers, spouse or close friends. Last medical review on September 14, 2018 Read this next series of words
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